Bakers Dozen
by Meowth's Toon Dragon
Summary: When Mime and Rhyme get a second chance at purchasing Mime the unicycle he's longed for, they take up a job.... little to know of the hell that would ensue from it...


Bakers Dozen

Starring

Mime, Rhyme, Handy, and Flippy

(There's, again, a bit of dialouge in this episode, though not as much as "Family Feud", all in squeakense of course. But, like last time, I'd prefer not to have to put "in squeakense" every time something is said as I feel that gets redundant!)

We start off seeing the magic/joke shop from "Mime to Five" and see Mime and Rhyme walking around the corner... but as they pass by the shop window, they see that the deluxe-ultra padded unicycle that Mime was eyeing last time is back in stock, displayed in the store window like a priceless gem. Rhyme looks at Mime nearly drooling at the sight of the magnificent unicycle and starts to chuckle... but suddenly he notices something in the window right next to it... A deluxe knife-juggling set, consisting of throwing knives all with sharp diamond-encrusted blades and a piece of padding surrounding the hilts like foam on a ski tower. Rhyme instantly starts thinking of himself doing his acrofbatic act with the set, turning it into an incredible act incorporating some of his best skills, and starts looking longingly at it, stars in his eyes. But sadly for them, as they soon remember, they're a little short on the green stuff.

Rhyme suggests a part-time job, but Mime, having already tried that, shakes his head no... That is until they look at the bakery next door and see the help wanted sign in the window. Now Mime may like his peanuts, but there's one food that both deer love snacking on during show breaks... doughnuts! (Hey, I figured Mime's already a bit pudgy, why not have him and his cousin like donuts?? If Petunia can have OCD, why can't Mime like junk food??) Realizing that a job in the bakery would net them both money AND some of their favorite food for free, they share a happy grin and head into the bakery

Next we see them talking to the manager of the bakery, a certain bathrobe-wearing bear named Pop, who's working behind the counter. After a few minutes of talking, we see Pop smile and say "You're hired!" and the deer cousins share a high-five and head behind the counter to start their new job as Pop heads out to get more supplies..

a few minutes later...

We see Mime helping the baker Giggles make the dough and pastries and see Rhyme up front, doing cashier work and taking advantage of the free donuts by hiding bags of them in his jacket and a couple of them on his antlers. As Mime takes out a pan of freshly made chocolate doughnuts, he can't help but take a big whiff of the aroma of steam, warm dough, and chocolate frosting, the smell almost intoxicatingly good. Suddenly he hears a loud "ahem!" behind him and, turning around, he sees Giggles looking at him and tapping her foot impatiently. With a silent grin, he puts the pan of pastries on a rack to cool off, just as Nutty, Flippy, Handy, and Lumpy all walk into the bakery.

Rhyme gives them a greeting and asks what he can get for them. Flippy and Handy just order a couple doughnuts and coffee while Nutty orders about 30 fried sugar-coated creme-filled doughnuts and Lumpy orders half a pound of lettuce and tuna. Right after Lumpy gives his order, EVERYONE in the bakery turns and stares at Lumpy, Rhyme even having to stifle a few giggles as he tells the moose that it's a bakery, not a grocery store. Handy then sighs and just says for Rhyme to get Lumpy a doughnut and water and the 4 of them start to get seated when Rhyme remembers that he's been meaning to ask him about helping him build a new magic cabinet and calls the carpenter beaver over.

As the carpenter beaver heads back to the cash register, we see Giggles reaching for the button to restart the flames for frying the doughnuts, keeping in mind that the window of the fryer is pointed directly at the tables for the kids who come in to see. Mime motions for Giggles to wait to push the button until he can add a little more dough into the machine for the 30 fried doughnuts. After the dough's added, Mime gives the OK signal and Giggles ignites the fryer.

We pan to Flippy who's talking with Lumpy and Nutty, albeit with great difficulty, when we hear this loud FWOOSH noise that startles the veteran bear. As he looks towards the source of the noise, he sees the flames for the fryer burning visibly, enlarged by the extra dough controlling the flames, and is slowly reminded of all the fires that he saw set to the P.O.W. camps. Nutty, seeing the beginning of the freakout, quickly ducks underneath the table! (hey, he may be sugar-crazed, but he ain't stupid!) Soon, the bear's fully transformed into his dark alter-ego and we see him get up and look eagerly for someone to maim. But Rhyme, safely behind the counter, sees Flippy's transformation and, knowing if he tries to warn the others he could alert Flippy to his location, motions silently for Handy to creep behind the counter. Handy starts to open his mouth to say something, but after seeing Rhyme's frantic shaking and motioning for him to stay QUIET, he shrugs and joins Rhyme behind the counter.

Flippy hears the squeak of the employee door and starts to go over towards the counter, but hears Lumpys goofy laughter and, seeing him playing with the straws blissfully unaware of the danger, gets an idea. Taking 4 straws out of the condiment station, he sneaks behind the moose and quickly embeds two in the mooses eyes and two in his nostrils! Lumpy starts to scream in pain as blood spews from the straw holes, but soon feels Flippy pulling back on his antlers. As Rhyme and Handy watch in horror, Flippy releases the antlers and the momentum causes his head to slam against the table, driving the straws through the back of his head! As they watch blood dripping onto the table and the pieces of brain sticking out the back of his head, we see Handy start to gag, revolted by the gruesome scene, but Rhyme whispers for Handy to get Mime and Giggles and head into the back immediately!

Handy swallows hard and nods, still a little nauseous and very frightened, and motions for Mime to go to the back as we see Rhyme creep into the back storeroom, Mime does so immediately, but as he, at the entrance to the back room, motions for Giggles to join him, the chipmunk loudly refuses, saying she takes pride in her baking abilities and is not about to leave the fryer, especially while it's going! It is then, as he turns away sadly from Giggles, he sees Lumpy's dead body and realizes what's going on, suddenly terrified and fearing for his life. Flippy hears Giggles and runs towards the counter as Handy and Mime mournfully duck into the storeroom. Giggles sees Flippy coming and tries to get into the back as well, but the bear reaches the counter and vaults right over and into Giggles path!

The chipmunk screams and tries to get away, but Flippy quickly grabs her by the neck and starts dragging her over to the fryer, Giggles yelling in terror. Opening the fryer door, Flippy shoves her head into the fire and, using his hands to hold down the chipmunk's arms, pushes the door against her neck, trapping her head inside the fire! As we look on the other side of the door, we see Giggles' skin start bubbling and oozing from the immense heat and her pupils slowly shrinking as the flames melt her optic nerves. Soon, we see both of her eyeballs go milky white for a second before popping like balloons from the intense flames, causing two streams of blood to drip down from her sockets and down her cheeks, mixed with the remnants of her melting flesh. Back on the other side, we see Flippy laughing evilly as he holds the door closed with his head, preventing her from escaping and lapping in her screams like it was the elixir of life. Soon the screams stop and, finally taking his head away from the door, Flippy pulls Giggles's head out of the oven. While we can see Flippy grinning fiendishly at Giggles head, we can't tell what's happened to it because of the camera angle. We hear the bell of the door ring and Flippy, letting Giggles body fall to the floor, crawls towards the cash register and waits for the buzzer at the front counter to ring.

Soon enough, a quick BUZZ can be heard and we see Flippy pop up from behind the counter, giving a deadly look. But then he sees that the person who rang the buzzer's none other than the Mole, the one HTF who can't see his fierce face, and gets even madder! Taking a pair of full frosting tubes, he plants one into the Mole's forehead and one into his chest with lightning-fast speed, knocking the Mole to the ground. Leaping over the counter and onto Mole's prone body, he takes ahold of the full tubes and gives them a massive squeeze, causing frosting, brains, and guts to be blown out of the holes surrounding the entry wounds (it would make more sense if it could get animated). Chuckling madly, he starts to get up from the frosting and blood decorated corpse when he hears the sound of the bell above the door ringing, signifying the next victim entering his hell as we see him turn towards the doorway with a demonic grin on his face.

The scene switches to the back storage room where Mime, Handy, and Rhyme are huddled together, trying to keep as quiet as possible as they listen in horror to the screams and evil laughter coming from the front of the store. Mime's silently sobbing into Rhymes arms as his cousin and Handy try to calm the frightened deer. Reaching into his jacket, he pulls out a bag of fresh chocolate donuts and gives one to Mime, saying eating it would give him a temporary distraction from the situation. Sniffling back tears, the silent deer takes the donut and takes a small bite. Feeling the wonderful taste of frosting and dough fill his mouth, he happily downs the rest of the donut and motions to Rhyme that he'd like another. Giving a small chuckle, he gives another to the deer, then offers one to Handy. Not having had the coffee or doughtnuts he ordered earlier, the beaver's feeling pretty hungry and, opening wide, he allows Rhyme to insert half the donut into his mouth before he bites down, savoring the taste of chocolate and sugary goodness. As Rhyme looks at Handy and Mime eating with a grin, he suddenly hears a loud scream come from the front of the store and looks in alarm at the door seperating the 2 sections, unable to help wondering about the chaos going on...

We switch back to the front of the store where we see Flippy planting what appears to be a bread cleaver through the middle of Disco Bear's head. As he watches Disco Bear's body fall to the floor, he hears the sound of teeth chattering in fright. Looking over, he sees a certain light-green squirrel cowering underneath the table where Lumpy's body is slumped over and, remembering the squirrels love of sugary foods, grabs a tray of piping-hot sugar pastries, still with bits of scorching oil on them, and starts shooting them towards Nutty like shurikens. The squirrel, seeing the sugary sweets coming his way, opens his mouth and proceeds to catch all, but one in his mouth! But the pastries, still burning hot from the fryer and cooking oil, start to cause his throat to boil and bubble, cutting off the squirrels oxygen. Gasping and choking, Nutty tries to take a breath, but only succeeds in causing himself to cough up blood and bits of burnt tissue, Slowly, the boils consume his throat and with one final gasp of air, he falls down dead onto the floor, hot blood pouring out of his mouth from the burnt areas of his esophagus.

The bear starts laughing even more fiendishly and picks up the one pastry that the squirrel didn't catch, laying near Nutty's body and now coated in blood, and lifts it up to his mouth to take a big bite, when he's interrupted by the sound of a ghastly scream. Looking over his shoulder, he sees Pop standing at the doorway of the bakery, looking on in horror at the bloodbath his store's become. Dropping the bag of supplies, he turns to run away to safety, but is no match for the veteran bear, who snatches up a heavy cooling tray and leaps onto Pop, pinning him to the ground. Pop pleads for Flippy to let him go, that he's got a kid to feed... but his pleas are all in vain. Flippy lifts up the tray and, with a loud guttural yell, smashes it down onto Pop's head, splattering brains, blood, and bits of skull everywhere. As he lifts up the tray, he notices his blood-drenched pastry laying near one of Pop's eyes and, picking it up, takes a big bite! As he savors the sick taste of blood and dough inside his mouth, he slowly comes to his senses and leaves the store while taking another big bite.

Hearing nothing but the eerie silence from the front of the store, Rhyme slowly gets up and pushes outward the door leading out of the storage room with Mime and Handy in tow. As he looks around in horror at the warzone the store's become, he hears the sound of violent gagging. Turning around, he sees Mime cupping his mouth and trying not to throw up, revolted by all the gore surrounding them. As Rhyme clicks his tounge sadly and makes his way towards the door leading out from behind the sales counter, he hears a very sick squishing sound followed by a startled gasp. Looking back again, he sees Handy looking down in revoulsion at what he's stepped in... namely Giggles remains. It's then that we finally see what happened to the chipmunks head; it's been reduced into nothing more than a sloughy mess of brains and flesh, not even attached to the body anymore. Mime can't hold his lunch down anymore and he throws up a torrent of bile and chocolate donut chunks all over Giggles liquified head and Handy's foot, causing the beaver to groan angrily at the deer. Close to being sick himself Rhyme takes off his jacket, revealing a white undershirt, and places it solemnly over the puddle that Giggles skull has become.

As he walks out from behind the counter with Mime, who's now looking very pale having just thrown up all over the floor, and Handy, trying to scrape the vomit and liquified flesh off his foot onto the floor, we can see the full extent of the chaos that was caused by the war veteran; the bodies of Lumpy, Disco Bear, the Mole, Nutty, and Pop in full view and blood pouring from their bodies. The table that Lumpy's remains are laying on is completely saturated in blood to the point where it's pouring off the table's edge onto the floor. The sight of all the blood is almost enough to make Handy throw up as well, but he manages to swallow his nausea back down with a groan. But as Rhyme looks over at Pop's corpse, a crimson mess where his head used to be, he sees that near the dropped bag of supplies is an envelope containing the large roll of money from the paystub Pop had just deposited. Figuring after all they'd been through they'd earned a hefty amount of money, he takes the envelope and motions for Mime and Handy to follow him out of the warzone.

He heads next door, intent on buying the unicycle and knives they'd seen earlier, but when the 3 survivors reach the magic shop window, they see to their dismay that the display is EMPTY! All this is too much for Mime, who's just been through a nightmare, and he just breaks down in silent tears as Handy and Rhyme just curse angrily. Suddenly, a figure juggling the diamond knives and riding the unicycle comes out of the store and who else is it, but a much calmer Flippy, who's laughing happily as he pedals down the street. At seeing Flippy so happy after putting him, his cousin, and Handy through Hell, Rhyme is slowly reminded of his own dark past. He remembers the audiences and clowns laughing, mocking him and Mime for being orphans and everyone else with their families, reminded of the one taken away from him and Mime. Slowly his pupils start to shrink and he starts growling, the rage consuming him and soon he's transformed into a mere shell of his former cheerful self. As he looks at Flippy riding away with Mime's unicycle and HIS knives, only one thought comes to mind which he speaks in clear english... "Must... Destroy... Flippy...".

As Handy and Mime, who've both heard Rhyme's angry words, look on in horror , Rhyme reaches up, and taking one of the donuts from his antlers, throws the pastry like a knife at the back of Flippy's head, where it hits him dead-on. The momentum of the pastry nailing him in the back is enough to knock the bear forward off the unicycle and onto the street. Flippy, the wind knocked out of him, starts to sit up, but doesn't get more than a few inches off the ground before two of the juggled knives come back down to earth, pinning Flippy to the street by his ears. The veteran starts to yell, but is soon silenced by the unicycle falling over onto his head, the force of the heavy seat and pole enough to split his skull wide open and cause his smashed brains to ooze from the gap fully visible between his eyes. Walking up to Flippy's split skull, Rhyme takes the two knives pinning down Flippy's ears as well as the 2 laying near the body and then lifts the unicycle off of the vet's crushed head, bringing up part of the smushed skull stuck on the edge of the unicycle seat. Giving a soft chuckle, he brings the unicycle over to Mime and Handy and just says "Look at me... I WON!!" before bursting into hysterical crazed laughter, his white undershirt speckled with blood as we iris in on Handy and Mime looking on in fear at the crazed deer Rhyme's become...

Moral:Life is always cheaper by the dozen!


End file.
